Tickets to your high school reunion - $150
Hotel room because you live over an hour away from said reunion- $70 (yeah, I’ m cheap like that)
Finding that most of the pretty, cool, popular chicks in high school are pretty much STILL the pretty, cool, popular chicks- PRICELESS!
*DAMN YOU KARMA! I was really counting on you for that one!*
So I went to my high school reunion this weekend (SHUT UP! I know! It’s really hard to believe I’m old enough for any of that mess). As it turns out I don’t remember 98% of those people. I don’t mean “WOW! That guy is OLD but I would recognize him if he showed me his high school picture kind”… I mean I just don’t remember them EVER. Some of these people went to school with me since kindergarten! There were a few that seemed vaguely familiar but for the most part NOT SO MUCH! It’s kind of disconcerting how little of my school years remained with me.
It’s crazy how I KNOW everything seemed sooooo stinking crucial back then but now it’s just a blur. I didn’t even drink in high school so I feel like I should remember more of it. I mean, I have memories but most of them are just flashes and I’m sure skewed entirely. Wouldn’t it be great if you knew how unimportant high school drama was when you were going through it? Yeah, everyone tells you shit like that but you don’t get it. Turns out 10 years (ok, 20 whatev) later that stuff really didn’t matter but it sure was life or death at 17. Wouldn’t it be fanfreakingtastic if I could have my 17 year old body AND my 3…er…27 year old mind. It’s kind of natures cruel joke isn’t it? By the time you realize you really do look pretty freaking good and none of the bullshit jealousy we inflict on each other matters it’s too late cuz you suddenly have some middle aged woman’s body and no one cares enough to be jealous.
I guess we all grow up and turn into our parents (or at least some version thereof). I’m sure there are still a few cheerleaders and football stars, I KNOW there are still some band nerds (my absolute fave btw) but in reality we’re all just grown ups now with kids of our own to watch endure the torture that is childhood. I wonder if they’ll listen when we tell them how stupid their drama is and how in 10…er..20 years it won’t matter in the least… Probably not. I’d tell them that all those super pretty, perfect, popular girls will be all raggedy and burnt out when they grow up but it seems as if SOMEBODY lied about that shit!
Oh well…. I guess I have my 30 year reunion to look forward to. Sooner or later those bitches are bound to burn out and start looking as haggard as the rest of the 48 year olds. I’m talking to YOU Karma! Don’t let me down again!
